everyone talks to himself
often, we laugh when we hear someone talking to himself. somehow we have the impression that normal people don’t do this. but did you know the Bible has much to say about the conversations we have with ourselves? in fact, it gives four important truths about those ongoing conversations.
our conversation reflects our self-respect
once in a while we whisper or talk out loud, but the majority of the time it’s a silent conversation more commonly known as thinking. when we’re thinking, what we’re really doing is talking to ourselves. But get this: when we’re thinking, we’re talking to ourselves ten times faster than anyone else can talk to us—from three to four thousand words a minute! this is why it’s so important for us to be aware of what we’re saying when we talk to ourselves.
some conversations we have with ourselves are just routine … like planning our schedule or planning sequential tasks. we also carry on running conversations in response to what we’re listening to from other people. for example, we may say to ourselves, "that was a stupid thing to say," or "where are they going with this?"
but one of the most important conversations we have is the conversation about ourselves. it’s not uncommon to say things to ourselves like, "that was dumb,” “i'm so stupid,” “way to go loser." yet, for all the times we catch ourselves running ourselves down we will never catch the Holy Spirit talking to us the same way.
the Holy Spirit may confront us, admonish us, and even correct us. but He will never speak to us disrespectfully or in a condescending or denigrating manner. God Almighty respects us as persons. because He does, we must do no less for ourselves.
even so, we easily reject this reality because we have the mistaken belief that what other people say to us affects us more, but this simply isn’t true. we’re far more affected by the silent conversations we have with ourselves.
2.
our conversation defines who we are
in proverbs 23:7, solomon says that as a person thinks within himself, that is who he is. what a powerful statement! it suggests that our self-speech can become self-fulfilling prophesy.
for example, in isaiah 14:12-14, we read about the conversation lucifer had with himself. his heart was lifted up with pride, and he said to himself that he would exalt his throne and become like the Most High. his self-talk expressed the pride and arrogance in his heart. it also revealed who he became.
in luke 12:17-19, Jesus lets us hear a rich farmer talk to himself. that conversation turned a rich man into a fool.
in matthew 9:21, we hear the private conversation the woman with the issue of blood had with herself. her conversation made the difference between terminal illness and healing.
that’s why one of the healthiest things we can do is to ask God to make us aware of how we talk to ourselves. then we need to ask Him to give us a glimpse of how He sees us. listen to what He has to say about us so we’ll be able to see ourselves as a loved and valuable person.
3.
our conversation is an interpretation of the past
none of us lives with the facts of our life. we live with the story we tell ourselves about the facts of our life.
quite honestly, there is no objective life. none of us sees life clearly. that’s why the apostle paul said in 1 corinthians 13:12 that we see ourselves in a cloudy mirror. we all see life through a distorted lens. that lens is distorted by our interpretation of our personal history. and the way we interpret the facts of our life determines the view we have of life in general.
there is a spiritual battle between God and the devil over whose interpretation of our past we’ll choose. the devil wants us to see our past as destructively as possible. he wants us to see ourselves as hopeless and helpless and stupid. he wants us to see ourselves as no good.
but, God wants us to see ourselves from His redemptive perspective. He sees us as someone Jesus Christ willing laid down His life to save. He sees us as someone He loves very much.
a disconnect occurs when we allow ourselves to stay victims of mental habits learned from our past. our mental habits shape our interpretation of our past. most of us are unaware that life has an accumulative effect upon us. that is, our hearts store all the thoughts and perceptions formed throughout our life. if we’re not careful, this storehouse can mold our self talk in a negative way.
Jesus refers to this when He says, “whatever is in your heart determines what you say. a good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart.” (see matthew 12:34-35)
the bottom line is our self-talk is colored by the contents of our heart.
4.
our conversation can change
hope and help for changing our self-talk can be found throughout the new testament.
for example, in philippians 4:7-8, we find practical instructions for changing the way we think and talk to ourselves. paul instructs us to fix our thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.
it's pretty hard to trash one's self when we focus on the positive and true. even when we screw up we don't have to talk trash. that's the beauty of redemption. we choose to exercise true submission and humility when we acknowledge our weaknesses and failings before Almighty God. then He in His inexplicable mercy and love forgives and restores us ... never rubbing our noses in it again! that's why we can walk in faith believing God causes everything (good or bad) to work together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose for them. (see romans 8:28)
ephesians 5:19-20, instructs us to sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among ourselves, and make music to the Lord in our hearts. and give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
it's really very simple. if we apply God’s Word, our self-talk will change and so will our future!